WHEN WORDS WON'T COME

What do we do when we can't seem to find the words to say to others? Even sometimes to ourselves. Why aren't they there? Why can't someone help us? Some of us turn to God and start praying and asking for the answers. Some turn to drinking and drugs. That answer is really no answer at all. All that does is take your money, gives you a high for a little while and then you need more money to get more with. Never ending circle. That seems like the life. Well, let me tell you it ain't. How many people have been hurt along the road that you are traveling? What we do not only affects us but others around us. Mainly our loved ones and close friends.

No, I am not going to get started on that subject. Our main object here is to let others know that even God's people do dumb, hurtful and mean spirited things as well.

I know from personal experience that a lot, maybe even more than a lot, that I did in my life, even though I thought it was right was only wrong. I hurt the very ones that I loved the most in the world. I honestly didn't realize that I was doing this. I have asked for and been granted forgiveness from most of them. Those I can remember anyway. But the hurt runs so deep that it can't be forgotten, must less forgiven. I understand that now.

We will reap what we sow. How true those words are.

Now it is my turn to reap the same things that I sowed. The loneliness, the hurt, the mean spiritedness and most of all the rejection. Even though rejection was not my intent that is what it turned out to be.

We can't go back and change the past. All we can do is do what is right for this day. Tomorrow isn't promised to us by God. We only have the now. Lets try to make it a now for God. I know God has forgiven me. Now I need to forgive myself. Ain't as easy as it sounds.

The only one I can blame for all that I am reaping is MYSELF. In time, His time, I know that forgiveness can and will be done. The one who did the original hurting ends up hurting the most. They have lost everything.

Please remember that when I say these three little words, 'I LOVE YOU' it comes from the very deepest part of my heart and soul.

God's blessings to each of you,

rECj/LJG