ROSE AND LINDA'S BLOG I WILL DO WHAT GOD HAS LED ME TO DO

SUNDAY EDITORIAL DECEMBER 30, 2012

 

The last Sunday of the year.  You know I love it when I hear a person say that on such and such a day in this or that year I did so and so. Me I don't remember like that,   I pinpoint by: one sunny day I walked to a friends and as we visited I asked does your computer work and she says she doesn't know , but 'you can have it'.  It worked and a complete new world opened up for me.  Pages of notes of scriptures and questions that God had laid on my heart now had a way to be shared.  Shared I did with one person, I call her my beloved, until one day I said maybe I should post these thoughts on a blog.  She in turn said 'I am glad, go to this site.'   I did and there were my words on-line with people reading them.  Five maybe six years with one break I have written of my love for the Lord.  There were times I did not want to write, even tried one time to run from it.  The harder I ran the more in pain was my soul.  This is why I write,  I have to add here that my beloved never gave up on me, she said nothing, and when I showed back up, God had her waiting for me.  Like God she asked no questions, forgave me and we picked up where we had stopped. 

 

I refuse to allow the devil to get any credit for my foolish mistakes.  I ran from life, family, everything that mattered to me.  Why, because I was searching for the very thing I was running from, the love of Christ.  Things in my life that I did not know how to handle, I ran from, instead of seeking Him.    I hurt many people that I loved.  How though could I love anyone else, when I did not love myself nor love God.  

 

Life is full of things that we can try to do to make ourselves happy, it was after those things that I went.  Am I ashamed of them.  My answer might surprise you.  It is because of what I experienced that I am able to know and understand much of what this life has to offer in ways of seeking the wrong thing.  

 

An example is what happened to me today.  As I walked outside today a young boy of 16/17 rode up on his bike.  He came to give me a hug and show me the pic of his new son.  He told me he could not come this close to my house without stopping to see me.  He is a survivor.  He is making it the only way he knows how.  What possible connection could this young black child have in common with a 60 year old white lady?  When we first met he rolled his eyes at me, and gave me a look that many would have backed up from.  I was an aid at a school for children that had been kicked out of the regular school system, the worst of the worst.  I asked him, who is your daddy? ' Aren't you J's son'?  He asked, 'How do you know my daddy?'   A door was opened as I told him how I knew not only his dad, but his uncle who is in prison for murder.  Here we are three years later, and he comes to visit me, because he knows I will not shut the door on him, because he sells drugs.  He knows that I will never look down on him, because I have done what he is now doing.  

 

The difference in us now,  God gave me something of better value to replace what I was doing.  And he knows this.  One day and I believe it is sooner now that he has a son, he will turn his life over to Christ.  This young man would never have talked to me if he did not know I understood his life.  There are a few other students from that school that run to hug me when they see me.  They know I do not judge them, that this old white lady does love them.  

 

My mistakes have given me the ability to know what many shoes feel like.  I know the feeling of someone saying to me "I know how you feel" and once asked have they ever gone through this, their answer is no.  

 

Jesus walked on this earth so that we could see it was possible to walk His walk without sin.  I have walked in sin, and I use that walk to reach out and say yes I know and God can forgive you just as He forgave me.  There is a way out. 

 

There is much I have never experienced, and I thank God for that.  He did promise He would never give me more than I could bear.  He gave me that promise when I asked Him into my life at thirteen.  I am so thankful that when I got off His path and went to live my own life my own way, He waited patiently for me to turn back to Him.  When I called out for Him, He was right there, He has never left me nor forsaken me.  

 

So I write.  I write what I am going through, what I see people around me going through, and always what He lays on my heart.  I have tablets of articles I have written or started to write that He has said No to.  It was not the time.  

 

If you have read this far, I am thankful for that.  Sunday is my day, He lets me share what is on my heart.  Someone this week told me I shouldn't write, I told them I would do what the Lord has led me to do and that is write.  If something I write stirs your heart, then you need to ask why.  Is it because you know that it is true or it causes you to question, is this you.  Is it an area of your life that you need to seek God on?  Does it cause you to question your relationship with Him?  

 

If we can encourage you to pick up your Bible, read His Word, seek His face, question why, then our purpose on this earth has been served. 

 

God Bless 

 

recj/LJG